Night Swim: A dull and dreary waste of time

By Rob Ryan

⭐ 1/2

Happy New Year, and Happy First Official 2024 release. For those who are unaware, there is a long standing tradition that during Oscar season in the first 2 to 3 months of the new year, if your multiplex isn't playing the latest Oscar contender, it is playing a low quality film that is most likely a horror film that the studio probably didn't have enough faith in to release in October. I thought that tradition died down years ago especially since we had solid movies like M3GAN released last year but now we have Night Swim which seems to serve no other purpose than to carry on that very tradition.

Based on the 2014 short film of the same name, Night Swim follows a typical Nuclear Family, consisting of father Ray (Wyatt Russel) Mother Eve (Kerry Condon) and their two children (Amelie Hoeferle and Gavin Warren) who move into a new house. But it's not just any new house, this one has a pool in the backyard, this is great news for Ray as his diagnosis for MS as a result of his years as a pro baseball player would be treated thanks to water therapy, all seems well, the kids get settled, Eve is happy and Ray's health starts to improve dramatically, a little too dramatically, so much so he gets too attached to the pool and that's not accounting for the flickering lights, the weird voices from the filter's and even the kids start seeing people from underwater, and even if they don't experience any of these things, they risk getting dragged underwater by an unknown presence.

The structure of the short film is simple, girl goes for a swim at night, creepy things happen, a monster/demon appears, she drowns/vanishes, the end. How do you justify adapting this to feature length?, I don't know but director Bryce McGuire and producer Jason Blum sure as hell tried their best but sadly all their efforts to expand the mythology, add some character drama alongside some pool action every 10 minutes where not enough to save this from being the dullest horror film released in a long time.

The characters are boring, the actors seem to be on autopilot and every scare is woefully predictable to the point that non of the jump scares came close to giving me a reaction, and that is saying something as someone who gets easily jumped by loud noises. Even the film's weird attempts at "comedy"(?) fall completely flat due to the movie being so droningly executed throughout that these elements feel completely unearned and from a completely different film, from the quirky estate agent who looks like a discount Sally Field to the pool technician who's obvious foreshadowing and cryptic monologuing only provoked feelings of confusion. His speech is only interrupted by slipping on the diving board and nearly falling in the empty pool which I can't help but feel that this was the demon's doing just to shut him the hell up.

There is a somewhat interesting twist in the third act that gives some context for information established earlier on as well as giving further development of what exactly is in the pool and what has a hold on the family and with some heavy reworking of the script and focus it could've made for a much more effective film. The angle of Ray rediscovering his health and finding his purpose again only to learn that his improved health comes at a price could have made some unnerving tension if maybe we where allowed to experience things from his perspective, which is more nuanced and compelling then recycling the short film every 10-15 minutes but non of that is given any room to breathe or flesh out due to the movie choosing to take the easy way out.

Same goes with the kids, the closest they have to having any sort of character is when they reluctantly choose not to tell their parents about the possibility of the pool being haunted due to not wanting to jeopardise their dad's progress. A compelling plot point much like Ray's story arc but the movie never develops on it, or establishes anything remotely gripping ever again and when we do get to the reveal of the Monster/demon, you can't help scoff as it looks so ridiculous, you might as well not have bothered in giving this villain a form, if anything It would've been more creepy had the villain had been this unknown entirety that non of the characters understand.

Kerry Condon who gave one the best supporting performances in 2022 with The Banshees of Inishernin is wasted here, playing a character who quite frankly could've been played by anybody. While no one stands out as bad, non of the actors are given anything to do. The film ends with a supposedly sad and dramatic moment but non of the characters show any emotion, even in the aftermath they look just as bored and uninterested as you would be if you went and saw this. If non of these people care, then why should we? All I could think about when this ended was how much I under appreciated M3GAN when it came out and how I so desperately want to go back to one year ago when I first saw just so I can enjoy it again. At least that was bursting with ideas in contrast to this which is as vacant as a dry, barren and empty pool.

Night Swim is out in UK cinemas now